29 January, 1997

To my Dad on his 53rd Birthday!!!

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Dear Dad,

Sorry I couldn't get this to you sooner, but I thought it didn't matter that much to you. I still want to show you how much I still care for and love you, though, so I made this page.

Ever since I was born, you've been proud of me. No matter what I did, what I said, or what I thought, you always thought I was special, and you always took care of me, got me things I wanted, and did things for me. You drove me to school sometimes. You picked me up and drove me to the dentist or doctor. You attended my important school events. You drove me to high school dances, and drove me back, even when I was depressed after, and made me talk to you about it. Then college started.

You brought me to Admit Day, Freshman Orientation, and Summer Bridge. All the while you knew we wouldn't see each other as much as before. The beginning of Freshman year was hard for me, but you helped me get though it, even if by phone. I was really excited to go home that Christmas vacation because I'd finally be home again after a very hectic and confusing first quarter. It got better, and I was more comfortable with college.

Every time I came back from school, you waited at the airport gate to pick me up. I was always excited to see everyone, even if I may not have looked like it. When break was over, I was still excited to go back to school (somewhat) and see my friends again, but I wasn't going to see my family for a while. But that was okay, since I knew I could always call if I needed something or needed someone to talk to.

Then last Spring Break I met her. The one I'd been looking for all this time. She was, and still is, everything I ever wanted in a girlfriend. We discovered that we love each other very much and continue to do so. My troubles were over, it seemed.

Maureen and I were very much in love, and I spent a lot of energy on our relationship, which maybe...no, definitely, had an impact on all of my other relationships. You and Mom were happy for me. My friends all said, "finally...." I still thank God every day for bringing her to me. It may seem as if I drifted apart a little from my family and my other friends. The truth is, I am finally getting my life into focus and some perspective so I can succeed in the world. For this, I think I have neglected many other things.

I know that I haven't been much of a roommate, or especially, a friend for Ben. Starting last March, I have been at my apartment less and less. But recently I've been trying to balance my time more. Last quarter was pretty good, because I was able to balance my grades, my fun with friends, and keeping up with my family. But this quarter, it didn't start out as I had planned. I've been able to stay home more, and (usually) do my homework, but I'd been forgetting to call home. This whole quarter I'd been preoccupied with so much stuff that it's always been a call from home instead of to home. I plan to change that.

Even when I came home for my birthday, I was so excited about everything that I didn't take time to really thank everyone, and say everything I wanted to say, and reassure everyone that I'm becoming more responsible, more like a man, and more ready to face the world. I guess I haven't proven that. But I do intend on always changing for the better, to learn from my mistakes.

As much as you are proud of me, I want you to know how proud I am of you. I tell my friends, especially Maureen, about my family and the cool things they do, even when I can't share with you. I want you to know how much I appreciate having a wonderful family, and especially wonderful parents. I want you to know how lucky I feel that I have not just a family, but a very close family, which is very hard to come by these days. And most importantly, I want you to know how much I love you, Dad, and also Mom, Claire, and Ima, and that I won't forget where I came from, and that I will always be proud of who I am because of you.

My love and my sincerest apologies,
your son,
ian